Confession

When I began this blog, I wanted it to serve as a medium to be able to share info about Addison with family and friends. I purposefully left out a lot of the things that were happening to myself and Steve.
When I was training to be a teacher, we were told again and again (once by a lawyer!) how important it was for teachers not to put "stuff" out on the internet. Tales were told of people fired based on things they had put on the internet. Now, I don't live a lifestyle that would leave me fearful of being fired, but I didn't like the idea of students or their parents looking me up on the internet and reading my blog or facebook account. I remember after Addison was born that I wrote an entire blog post about my experiences suffering from baby blues. I never posted it.
What has changed? I am no longer a teacher. It feels weird at moments to say that because I loved being a teacher. Even though I have loved being a teacher, what I wanted even more was to be a full time stay-at-home mommy. As a child, my mother stayed home with us. I remember vividly sitting down at the kitchen table for mommy's "school" (mom wanted to keep our brains sharp during the summer months). I remember several times forgetting needed items as home that were quickly brought to me by my mother. I always knew that if we had a big event at school or if they needed a volunteer to help that my mom would be there. I've always wanted to be that kind of mother.
Steve and I couldn't afford for me to stay home when Addison was first born, but with Steve getting his first big 'after college' job it has made this possible. There are still sacrifices. Steve is gone for 3 weeks at a time. When he comes home, the visit is 3 days before he returns. Addison often asks for her daddy and I have to remind her daily "Daddy's at work." Financially, of course we would be better off if I continued working, but we have agreed that we can make this situation work.
Okay, so now that's out of the way. . . here's my confession. I've wanted to be a stay-at-home mom for years, so I found it very interesting my gut reaction to a situation a few weeks ago. While Steve and I were at the hospital with Addison, the nurse was asking me questions about our insurance. She asked to confirm that I was a teacher. I corrected her and told her that I was a stay-at-home home. She plugged me in as a "homemaker." And it happened. I felt this small flutter of embarrassment inside of myself. Why? Where did that come from? I worried about how that woman perceived me because of my "lack of a job." Did she think I was uneducated? Did she think I was lazy? I felt embarrassed and confused about why I felt embarrassed.
I told my sister-in-law Melissa about this experience. She said she thinks it was Satan's influence. I think she has a point. Satan has been working on destroying the family. Culturally, it is typical now for the husband and wife to work. Steve and I discussed how nice it would feel to have me work another year and to pay off a nice chunk of the house.
But then I think back to the mornings when Addison wanted me to read her a book and I had to rush her/me out the door to get to school. I think of the times that she showed me a letter and wanted me to teach her about it, but I was too tired or too busy fixing dinner or grading papers. Now, I imagine all the books we have read together now that I'm home all day. I imagine the little "discoveries" that Addison has made and I was able to witness. I think of all the times she has grabbed my face and kissed me with all the love and gratitude she feels towards me. I think this stay-at-home mom thing is going to be good. . .

Potty Training: 3 Day Charm?

Today's potty training was thrown off by so many variables that I have a hard time even counting today as potty training! I wanted to have 3 full days to fully focus on potty training as suggested in the E book I read 3 Day Potty Training. Today; however, was full of chaos and just weirdness. For starters, Addison did not want to drink very much today which affected how much she even needed to go potty, so we really didn't have that many opportunities to practice going potty. Secondly, I didn't do as good of a job of keeping the proximity that is needed for Addison right now. Thirdly, I found out today that the baking cups that I needed TODAY that should have been here LAST WEEK were NEVER shipped! I couldn't believe it! This lead to me leaving the house with Addison to take baking cups to my sis-in-law who is making the declicious, gorgeous cupcakes. I decided not to put Addison in a pull-up for the trip, but I did have her go potty before we left and tried to get her to go at Melissa's house when we got there. Again, Addison barely drank today so I wasn't as nervous as I may have been in different circumstances.
For bed, I ended up putting a pull-up on Addison. For starters, Addison was very thirsty when we got home (30 minutes before her bedtime) and I wanted her to drink since she hadn't all day and we had gone out in the 102* weather (air conditioned car, but still!). I don't even really want to make ANY decisions right now about potty training because it has been such a stressful, messed up day to begin with. I'm glad that I had mentally allocated Saturday to be another practice potty day if needed. I think that Addison and I will take a trip to Grammy's house to take a dip in the pool, but otherwise it will be another low-key day working on keeping those panties dry. . .

Potty Training: Take 2

If you haven't potty trained, be prepared for the second day slump. For me, the "slump" is the fact that your child probably won't be near as fascinated with potty training and being a big kid as they were the day before. Sure, Addison enjoyed her panties, but she didn't greet the training with as much excitement as before. I have to admit that I too was feeling a little less excited about our new adventure.
That does not mean there wasn't progress today. In fact, Addison today did not have any accidents. Now, you have to understand what I mean by accidents. Currently, Addison says "potty" and gives me "the look" right as she is about to go or right after she begins to pee. At that point, I become a member of SWAT whose mission it is to bear the ticking time bomb and to haul uh, booty to get that bomb out of the danger zone! I RUN (not joking) holding Addison saying, "Hold it! Hold it till we're on the potty!" Addison's panties are a LOT less wet today, so I think she is beginning to get the hang of it. I am hoping that tomorrow we continue to progress, although I am mentally preparing myself for digression. Reading and other friends have warned me that children sometimes digress after the novelty has worn off, so I'm trying to prepare for that.
How do I feel this adventure is going so far? Overall, I am very pleased with the progress. I am beginning to question the need for the rewards/sticker chart. It does help get her enthusiastic and helps her to be rewarded for going potty, but I do fear that she may at some point begin trying to potty just to get a sticker. There was a point today that she asked 3 times in 10 minutes to go potty, but nothing came out. Was that because she misread her body or because she wanted a sticker? Also, Addison sometimes gets upset that I am putting the hearts on her chart instead of on her body. Should I allow her to wear a sticker AND put one on her chart? Also, how long should this reward/chart routine occur? I'm THINKING that maybe after my stickers run out or my printed charts run out that it would a good time to call the rewards/charts quits. . .we'll see what happens. I didn't realize in potty training Addison that I would also be going through training too!

Potty Training: Day and NIGHT!

Day one of potty training. . . a huge success. Last night, a nightmare! It took forever to convince Addison to go potty twice as recommended by 3 Day Potty Training. I finally got Addison to bed and went back in a little over an hour later to take Addison potty (the author suggests this for children that do not wake up dry- Addison NEVER wakes up dry). I gently tried to rouse Addison only to find her DEAD asleep! I touched her bottom only to find that she had already gone pee and was now completely sleeping in her own urine. . . nice. I removed her shorts and panties (she's still completely asleep by the way) and picked her up because she was still sleeping in a pool of urine that had been soaked into a potty training mattress pad sheet. I placed a very groggy Addison on the potty and she very confusedly hugged me and groaned. No go.
After wiping off the pee, changing the sheets, and redressing Addison's bottom half, I dropped my still mostly asleep child back in bed.
At 5:15 am, I awoke and went in to rouse Addison to have her try and go potty (again following the 3 Day Potty Training instructions of going in 1 hour before the child usually rises). I found myself enjoying a cup of dejavu as Addison was already sleeping in a pool of sickenly smelling urine. I repeated my past steps with the only difference being that Addison fussed a lot about being put on the potty this time. After she sat there, not going potty, I lifted her up and took her back to the room to lay her back to bed. I thought Addison would lay down quietly because she was basically asleep on my shoulder already, but NO! She began screaming "mommy, mommy!" and wanted OUT OUT OUT! I went ahead and left her and thankfully after 5 minutes she calmed down and slept till 8pm.
After going through this nightmare, I seriously questioned WHAT SHOULD I DO? Do I put Addison in pull-ups at night? I have LOTS of friends that use pull-ups at night till their children are older, but they are potty trained during the day. . . .I could see how it be confusing to the child. . . don't pee in panties during day, pee away at night. . . .but still I didn't want to do THIS routine every night.
You may be surprised to hear that I laid Addison down tonight in her panties! I'm shocked myself, but here's what happened. Addison woke up after her afternoon nap. . . dry! I didn't think she would; she had downed milk like there was no more milk in the world and all the cows had disappeared, but it was true. I also kept thinking about how I had only given it one night and I keep hoping, wishing, PRAYING that it won't be as bad as last night. So I sit here typing while Addison gently falls to sleep and I'm hoping to find a dry baby in 30 minutes that wants to go potty and not stew in pee during her sleep. . .

Pics for Prepping for Panties

Addison showing mommy the sheep car she got for going potty on the toilet 3 times!

Look at the excitement!

I posted this checklist on the mirror in Addison's bathroom. It has really helped, because Addison is so excited about going potty that she wants to run out of the bathroom in excitement. I'm able to easily remind her with pictures the steps she needs to take.

Addison's personal potty chart. This is her 2nd potty chart, so the next time she goes 1. pee in the potty 2. poo in the potty 3. or wakes up dry after a nap or bedtime she will earn another heart sticker and get a present!

Prepping for Panties

I was not eager to hit the potty training milestone. Compared to some, I don't really mind changing a dirty diaper. Sure, if my husband is around I might try and finagle him into changing Addison (secretly it is hoping it is a poopy diaper and I can hear his groans of displeasure). But, then the day came. Addison began asking to go to the potty, multiple times a day. I worried that if I didn't take advantage of her curioristy and enthusiasm that this moment might pass me by. More signs came. My mom came to wake Addison after her nap only to find that Addison had removed her diaper. I noticed Addison attempting to remove her diaper many times. My favorite "readiness sign" was while I was teaching sharing time at a ward I was visiting. One of the nursery leaders comes to tell me that Addison needs a diaper change. I go to the nursery to find my child missing! The nursery leader informs me that Addison is already in the bathroom. I walk into the bathroom, assuming a nursery leader has Addison in there awaiting my diaper change. Instead, Addison is sitting on the potty! The nursery leader explains how confused she was that Addison had on a diaper but was asking to go the bathroom.
Okay, I get it. I give up. Let's potty train. First, I needed some prep before I went and bought princess panties (actually, I ended up with Dora panties, heart panties, and flowers. . .) I opened up the E book recommended to me by a friend from school 3 Day Potty Training. I read through it about 5 times and even took notes over the principles it taught. What I enjoyed most about this method was the focus on remaining positive and on actually dedicating 3 days to just potty training. Originally, I had pictured myself setting a timer and every 15 minutes, 30 minutes taking Addison to the potty to "try." Instead, the author encouraged statements such as "Tell mommy when you need to go potty, okay?" thus allowing Addison to feel trusted and like she was in control of the situations. Accidents were expected to happen and were to be treated as part of the learning experience. No lecturing, no timeouts. Instead, saying something like "Yucky, your panties aren't dry anymore!" was enough to indicate that Addison had failed to keep her panties dry as instructed.
After reading 3 Day Potty Training multiple times and making a checklist for myself (if you know anything about me, you know I love a checklist!), I went shopping for rewards for Addison. I got her coloring books, fruit snacks, stickers, play food for her kitchen etc. I also made her own custom reward chart. I was able to save money, make it personal for Addison, and was able to get the reward chart to fit with my intentions. Some charts have you giving stickers for each step wiping, flushing, peeing, etc. . .I knew that I would not be able to keep up with that kind of chart every day! I also wrote out what we would be eating (including snacks) and prepped as much food as possible. That way, I would be able to focus on Addison and her potty training the entire day!
Potty Training Day 1: After breakfast, I took Addison into her room and removed her diaper. I showed her the big girl panties and told her how proud I was of her. Addison and I together threw away the last diapers and wipes that we had (part of the 3 day training method- shows Addison that we are done with diapers and also removes the temptation for mommy to put diapers back on!) To summarize the day: Addison had about 10-15 accidents, most of which were not difficult to clean up. Addison went potty on the toilet 5 times today! Granted, she is still telling me "potty" right as she begins to pee so she only finishes going potty on the toilet, but she is still figuring out her own body and the "when" she is going to go. Addison didn't poop today, so it will be interesting to see how she handles getting to the toilet for that. After 3 heart stickers, Addison received her present. She got a sheep car and a mini package of m&ms. She quickly gobbled the m&ms and kept her sheep car close to her the rest of the night, often reminding me that she went "potty" got "hearts" and "hearts" got her "sheep car".
Overall, I am very pleased with the first day of training. My favorite part was that neither Addison nor I broke down in tears and I think she felt herself getting big. Addison kept pointing to her panties and saying "Kenna", because she recognizes that she has big girl panties just like her cousin Makenna.

Broken Bird

I have been trying to blog about Addison's broken arm for awhile, but I had some computer issues and then got lazy. Sorry! Here is Addison on the way to the bounce house. She was feeling a little cranky on the ride. I thought her pout face was pretty cute, so I took a pic!

See, the bounce house was fun at first. . .

Love this pic of Makenna!

My very cute nieces!

Addison was loving climbing through the different tunnels and going down the slides!

Bryn and Addison playing the ball pit. You could put balls in front of the air gun and shoot them into the hoop!

Daddy and Addison

Steve and Makenna playing

Both Bryn and Addison kept trying to interrupt Steve and Makenna's game. They wanted to play too!

This machine blew air at you to make you feel like you were in a hurricane. Addison and Makenna loved it; Bryn. . . not so much.

AND THEN. . . .

Addison and Steve climbed to the top of a slide. I was waiting with Bryn and Jen to follow after them. Steve told me that he let Addison go down on her own and she went down 2/3 of the slide fine. Towards the end of the slide, Addison ended up rolling and she began to cry. Jen and I heard her cry on the other side of the slide, but it didn't sound bad or particuarly distressing. When I went down the slide; however, I was greeted by Steve with Addison in his arms, her shoes/his shoes in his arms, and Addison's butterfly backpack.

"We have to go" Steve whispered urgently.

"What, why?" I asked confused.

"Addison broke her arm."

"What!?"

Steve says I overreacted and was "causing a scene", but you have to understand that this all happened in 10 seconds and I was still wrapping my head around what had happened.

Addison's arm looked swollen, her hand was limp, and there was something about it that did appear "off." I didn't have trouble believe Steve's analysis of my daughter's broken limb. We climbed into the car and drove quickly to Mercy hospital. (The same hospital where Addison was born)

Addison was a real trooper during this entire experience. She barely cried as long as we held her. At times, she wanted her daddy to hold her and other points she wanted mommy. We passed her back and forth gently each time she requested it. Waiting for the doctor, Addison fell lethargic, almost asleep.

Addison napping on me waiting for the doctor. It is her right arm that is broken; we tried to keep it gently on my soulder. Steve held Addison during her x-rays. I felt terrible for Steve and Addison. The x-ray tech was having trouble deciding how she wanted to position Addison's tiny arm under the machine. Addison was crying to whole time, because who wants a stranger to be messing with you arm that hurts? The x-ray tech gave Addison a purple bear for being so brave and good during her x-rays. Ever since, Addison has insisted on sleeping with it. (Every night, Addison has to sleep with 1. her "lamby" 2. her "paci" 3. her "blanky" and 4. her purple bear)

Addison had her arm wrapped and was put in a sling. She didn't like wearing the sling very much, but it really helped to keep her arm from moving. You can also see her new purple bear and her very stressed mommy!

I can't believe my baby girl already has had a broken arm. . .she's barely two! Steve and I have always stayed so close to her and have watched her so protectively. . . .we've been teased about it! And yet, it happened. As much I hate seeing my broken bird, I love seeing how she has risen above it. I have never seen her frustrated with her cast and I have seen her quickly and beautifully find ways to use just her one arm to accomplish all of her goals/desires. Addison has shown her cast to lots of people (whether they asked her or not). Addison holds up her cast, smiles, and says "slide."

Baby Dreams

Addison and I have the same conversation every morning when I go to get her out of her crib.
Me: "Addison, did you sleep good?"
Addison: "Yes."
Me: "What did you dream about?"
Addison: "Moo!"
Apparently, Addison dreams about cows every night. . .

Little Talker

Addison "talking" to her cousin Bryn on her pretend phone:

"Hi Bryn! How are you? Yes. Bye!"

Addison's 2 Year Checkup!

I have to admit that I have been nervous about Addison's 2 year appointment. The last two times they have checked Addison's percentages she was 2% for weight and 2% for height. She has slowly gone down in percentages and Dr. Simmons said that if she fell off the chart that we would need to "talk" about it, which really scared me! To top it all off, the day before her appointment Addison broke her arm!
The appointment went much better than expected. Addison now weighs 23 lbs. 6 oz (8% for weight-I think the cast boosted her weight a little bit here, but no biggee), 32 1/2 inches tall (11% for height), and her head is 46 1/2 cm around (21% for head). Basically, I have a healthy, petite girl on my hands and I love her!

Something Like Love

Addison broke her arm Friday morning, so we spent Friday evening cuddling as a family.

Steve to Addison: I love you. No so much that I wish my arm was broken though. . .
Me to Steve: DIRTY look
Steve: What?! I'm bigger; it would hurt more!

Rewind in Time

Okay, so I got behind in blogging and missed out on putting up some pictures/memories that I really enjoyed. Here's Steve and I at one of Addison's swim lessons at the YMCA. It was a lot of fun, but the water sure was cold!

You gotta have a rubber ducky!

The instructor had one play "Pop goes the weasel" and to push the ball under water and release it. This helps Addison learn to put her body in the correct swim position as she tries to retrieve her ball.

Steve only got to come to one of Addison's lessons. Addison really enjoyed having her daddy there. Nanna Rhonda came along and was able to take pictures! Thanks Nanna!

Steve also got to join us for one of Addison's gymastics classes. Steve is helping Addison do her "1, 2,3 apple tree" move for balance!

How many people does it take to get Addison across the bars? :) Coach Breanna and Daddy to the rescue!

Mommy's turn to help!

Addison is getting much better at the zipline. She doesn't want to go across solo still, but she will let me just barely touch her so she feels secure.

Addison and Steve coming down the LONG slide at the omniplex! It was a long slide that kept looping. The first time I went down it, I thought I was going to fall off!

I love my family!

2 silly girls!

I caught Gigi playing with one of Addison's soft baby bottles. It cracked me up! She was upside down and had the nipple part of the bottle in her mouth! Silly girl!

Caught in the act!

I tried giving Addison pigtails. Not the prettiest pigtails, but I think it turned out pretty cute. I feel so bad for Addison sometimes. I'm terrible at doing hair!

Addison "reading" the book to mommy! I'm very grateful that Addison loves reading books. I hope that she will keep that as a life long enjoyment.

Baby Bling

Addison is having a tutu problem. It keeps falling off!

Addison loves playing dress-up, but in our house we like to call it "bling". As you can see, Addison's outfit wasn't complete until she had bracelets, necklaces, a tutu, and shoes to complete her ensemble!

Cozumel Trip!

Steve and I had an AWESOME time in Cozumel! We spent most of the trip scuba diving, but we do a few pictures to show our time out of the water. Try not to judge the outfit/look here. . .I was SO exhausted after scuba diving all day! Fashion was the last thing on my mind. . .

My little sister Kimber and I. It was nice being able to spend time with her and her husband Kyle.

We went to a different hotel than we have been to in past years. This hotel was "Iberostar". It was further from town, but closer to the best diving spots! On the other side of the wall was where Kimber and Kyle stayed. We had fun scuba diving, playing cards, and goofing around. Kimber made me go over there one night after she got scared! :)

The iguanas are sunbathing!

Everyone from the trip: Jim (Kyle's dad), Kyle, Kimber, my mom and dad (AKA Brad/Jan) and Steve and I. We told the group of taxi drivers that whoever told our picture would get to drive us to our hotel! :)

At the back of a tourist shop, we found this little bar with saddles as the barstools! We couldn't resist hopping on!

Kimber and dad chilling out before dinner

We saw lots of animals at our hotel. We saw a parrot that lives there, these flamingos, iguanas, cats, birds, peacocks, and lots of little lizards! It really added to the atmosphere!

I loved that the hotel rooms were little huts with two rooms on each side of the hut. I did get lost a few times though!

2 iguanas climbing in the bushes! We also saw iguanas climbing trees and birds stealing food right off the buffet table!

Highlights/Trip Memories:

1. Seeing the biggest turtles and the most sharks I've ever seen while diving

2. Letting Steve and Kimber share air off of me during the same dive! (I'm really earning my nickname "The Fish")

3. While letting Kimber bum air off my tank, going through a skinny tunnel and having to let myself scrape the entire time because I know Kimber would freak out if she touched the coral!

4. Seeing a cat in the bushes and thinking it was an iguana

5. Playing cards with Kimber and Kyle - Scum anyone?

6. Getting to know Kyle (my sister's husband) better

7. Realizing that all our of group are TERRIBLE frisbee throwers!

8. Coming back from Cozumel only to realize I had no tan/sunburn. . . whoops!

9. Enjoying our first trip without Addison- realizing that I can actually be away with her and not die. . . I wasn't sure ;)

10. Spending time with my family and remembering how much I love them!